


Sincerely With All My Heart

by jihyuncompass



Series: Jihyun Week 2020 [2]
Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol Mentions, Angst Mentions, Anniversaries, F/M, Letters, Rika Mentions, brief discussions of trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:40:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27857701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jihyuncompass/pseuds/jihyuncompass
Summary: On your one year anniversary you and Jihyun reminisce.
Relationships: V | Kim Jihyun & Main Character, V | Kim Jihyun/Main Character, V | Kim Jihyun/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Jihyun Week 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2035321
Kudos: 12





	Sincerely With All My Heart

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for Jihyun Week 2020 for the Prompt "Letters" This was was a fun one. I hope you enjoy it.

On the first anniversary of being with Jihyun, and the third anniversary since you first met him, the two of you sat together at the dinner table. Dinner had been finished for a while by now. Both of your plates are empty and glasses of wine are already finished. Now you were just sitting at the table, talking about whatever was on your mind. 

“Dinner was good?” Jihyun asked you. You smiled. 

“Dinner was amazing. That recipe you found was incredible, we’ll definitely have to hold onto it.” 

“Agreed.” Jihyun inched his hand over to hold yours. He had the most gentle of smiles, the ones that warmed your heart and made butterflies flutter in your stomach. It’s a smile that could take over the world if he wanted it to. 

The past year could only be described as the best year of your life. From the day Jihyun returned to you at the RFA party it felt like your world had been filled with so much more life. The things you previously found dull like cooking, cleaning and doing the smallest of household chores felt like grand adventures and sweet romanticized moments you could only find in a film. Jihyun truly felt like the last missing puzzle piece of your heart, and with him you felt happier than you’d ever been. 

Now sitting here, holding onto his hand, staring into his eyes you could help but smile like an idiot. You just wanted to keep staring at him and never stop, let yourself get lost in his vibrant eyes over and over again. 

“I have a gift for you.” Jihyun said, snapping your out of your train of thought. You leaned forward. 

“So do I.” You said.

“Then why don’t we take care of these first?” Jihyun’s smile grew while he pushed his chair back and grabbed the plates you both had pushed aside, taking the plates he went back to the kitchen. Getting up from your chair you took the two dirty wine glasses and followed him. 

You began your usual routine, Jihyun washed and scrubbed the dishes while you rinsed and dried them. At this point it was automatic, you knew when to reach out your hand to take a plate and he knew when you were about done with whatever you were drying in order to hand you the next one. Together you hummed along to the music you had playing over the sound of the running water. Little words were spoken, but they didn’t need to be. The feeling of being close to one another was more than enough. 

Working together the two of you finished washing the dishes quickly and then made quick work of putting them all away. Again with few words needing to be spoken. 

Choosing to move to the living room you both brought out the gifts you’d prepared for each other. Earlier in the month you’d both agreed not to go with anything to fancy. Preferring gifts more from the heart than something expensive. 

The gifts were two similarly shaped boxes. Sitting beside each other you both slowly tore off the wrapping paper covering the gifts. Both finding matching boxes willed with envelopes. 

You both looked at each other, similar looks of confusion. 

“Jihyun are these?” 

“They’re some of the letters I wrote to you while I was gone.” He said. “I sent you some but there were dozens I couldn’t get the courage to send. So I put them in this box to hold onto, but. I want you to be able to read them now.” You smiled and looked back into the box, sure enough you could see several dozen letters, all with your name written on the envelope in Jihyun’s messy handwriting. “And these letters are?” 

You looked over to the box you’d given him. “Well I couldn’t really send you letters, since I rarely knew where you were but I would write to you, a lot. And since I couldn’t send them I just collected them.” He looked into the box, at the similarly dozens of letters you wrote to him. The two of you laughed. “I guess great minds think alike huh?” 

Jihyun kissed your cheek. “I guess so.” He turned back to the box, taking out the first letter in the box. Dated just a week after he had left. Being careful to not tear the envelope he opened it and pulled out the paper inside. Unfolding the pages. 

“Dear V,” He started. “It’s only been a few days since you’ve left, and yet I miss you so much already. We knew each other for such a short amount of time and yet I find my world completely changed. I still remember the way you looked at me that last time we saw each other, I want to remember that look forever. 

I don’t know where you are right now. You could be anywhere in the world right now, but I hope wherever you are you’re safe, and I hope you can find some of the answers I know you are so desperately looking for. 

I miss you, and I promise I’ll wait.

Sincerely yours, MC.”

A small smile was present on your face. Even though you had collected these to give to him, you hadn’t read them back since you first wrote them. Inclined to just seal them up and move on with them. Jihyun put the letter back into the envelope and then motioned towards you. 

“It’s your turn.” He said. 

“Is that how we’re doing this?” You laughed. “Alright, I’ll read one of yours.” You took out the first one. Dated just merely a day after he had left. You opened up the envelope and cleared your throat. 

“Dear MC, 

I still can not get the picture of you out of my mind. I’m currently at the airport, waiting on a taxi to take me to a hotel I’ve booked, and sitting here I can’t get you out of my head. There’s this temptation in the back of my head to turn around and get back on a plane home. But I won’t. This is something I need to do, and I’ll return to you when it’s the right time. 

Even though I’m not with you I hope you know I’m thinking about you. I wonder if you can feel my heart reaching out to you. 

As selfish as it might be. I hope you’ll wait for me. 

Yours truly, V.”

You closed the letter, even just reading it you can remember the voice of the man you met first. The mysterious photographer V, and thinking about Jihyun now, it truly was like he was a completely different person. Yet still in his words you could feel the seeds of the Jihyun Kim you know starting to take form. 

Setting it aside so you would remember you’d opened that one you looked back to Jihyun. 

“Your turn.” He turned back to the box and retrieved the next envelope. This one dated one month after he’d left. You tried to think back on what you had written in, or what was on your mind at that point. While he opened it you couldn’t force yourself to remember. 

“Dear V, 

The past month has been so strange. Adjusting after everything has been a lot harder than I expected. Though, I guess I didn’t expect it to be easy either. I guess you don’t just get abducted by a cult and go back to normal life huh? 

Luciel told me you were in Europe recently. I wonder what you saw there, I keep imagining you in art museums, walking along the city streets with your camera. I hope you’re enjoying yourself, and I hope your eyes are healing well. 

I constantly find myself thinking about you. Every time something happens you are the first person I always want to tell. Even though by now we have spent far more time apart than we have together I still think of you. And I can’t help but wonder, if you’re thinking about me too. 

I’m still waiting, and I don’t plan on stopping. 

Sincerely yours, MC.”

Jihyun looked at you, closing up the letter. “I did think about you. All the time. Everywhere I went I would constantly imagine you there with me. The first few months, those were the most difficult and imagining you with me. It always helped.” You leaned over kissing Jihyun’s cheek. “Now. I think it’s your turn?” You pulled out the next one. This one marked around three months after he had left. 

Two things also came inside it. One was a torn up plane ticket. Listing for the same date as the letter. A flight that had obviously been cancelled. The second thing, what looked to be a sketch. It looked like a bustling coffee shop. In the corner of the paper, Jihyun’s signature. 

“Dear MC, 

I’ve been in London for the past week and a half. Being here I am struck by just how beautiful it is, and just how much I wish you were here with me. 

Last night I bought a plane ticket on a whim. I had been struggling, nightmares seemed to be constantly plaguing my mind, and when I would wake up all I could think of was you. I almost longed for the days I was under the influence of that drug, if only so I could wake up with you next to me. There to comfort me when I felt scared. 

I ended up cancelling the ticket, as badly as I want to see you. I also want to see you when I’m the man who deserves to be around you. And considering my state last night, I still have a lot of work to do. 

This morning I sat in a coffee shop, feeling lost in my own thoughts. And for the first time in as long as I can remember I felt the urge to draw my surroundings. My skills aren’t very good yet and I wish I could have done better, but this is progress. 

I miss you, and I hope you’re well. 

Yours truly, V.” 

You held the sketch in your hand, You could nearly imagine yourself sitting there, seeing all the very things he saw, and looking over the details, you could see where his art style was taking shape. Although only in small details here. 

Jihyun shook his head at the sketch. “That is much worse than I remember it being.” You raised your eyebrow. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, I think it looks great.” You smiled looking over the details again. “I can tell you worked hard on it, and I love it.” You slipped the ripped up ticket and the sketch back with the letter in the envelope. You motioned towards the box in Jihyun’s lap. “Your turn now.” 

This letter was dated six months after he left. Like the others you wondered about its contents. Jihyun opened it and unfolded the page, before he spoke you saw the way his eyes read the first sentence with hesitation. 

“Dear V,

I broke down in front of Jumin today.

We were just having dinner. Like we have for months now, I’d had only one glass of wine. We were sitting on the couch, just talking. He’d been talking about his childhood with you. He even pulled out old photos of you. 

He showed me a picture of when you were a kid, and ones from highschool. But then there was this one. It was you and Jumin, and Rika. 

There was something about seeing her that set me off. I just kept imagining her standing over you back at Mint Eye. Down in that dungeon after you’d been drugged. I kept seeing the way you looked after she’d stabbed you. I just. Kept hearing her voice in my head. And I broke down. 

I feel terrible for Jumin. He had no idea what to do, and I couldn’t stop crying. In the past six months I’ve cried a lot sure, but never in front of anyone, and especially not in front of Jumin. 

I guess. I guess what happened left a much bigger mark on me than I thought. 

I miss you V, but I’ll keep waiting. 

Yours truly, MC.” 

Jihyun closed this letter slowly, He looked at you, you took his hand. 

“I had a rough go of it for a while.” You cringed. “Actually the six months to one year point was pretty rough.” Jihyun moved to sit closer to you, to see your face more up close. “I don’t think I really dealt with what happened, and then it all kind of hit at once.” Shrugging you rubbed the back of your neck. 

You and Jihyun moved through the stacks of letters. Some were written days apart, others, weeks. Some of them were deep and philosophical, others were mundane. Like the one where you spent all of the page complaining about your grocery list, or another one where Jihyun wrote about a terrible plane ride he’d been on. Some were positive, filled with hope and a belief that things would get better. Then some were sad, like when Jihyun wrote about his mother, or his relationship with Rika. Some of yours were angry. Angry at the world, at life, at Rika, at him, at yourself. 

The both of you cringed at the angry ones you had written. He read them while you apologized continuously. You assured him you were just struggling and didn’t know how to direct your emotions. And Jihyun forgave you with a kiss and a hug. 

“I’m sorry I wasn’t here to help you when you were struggling. You shouldn’t have felt like you were going through it alone.” You held him tight but shook your head. 

“No, you shouldn’t have had to feel like you had to care for me. You had so much you were also trying to figure out. By staying you would have ended up taking care of me instead of yourself.” 

“I guess you’re right about that.” He put the last letter he read back in the box. “You do know me well.” You laughed. 

Like with the letters you wrote, there were ones Jihyun had written that made him cringe. Though instead of the anger you had, Jihyun’s letters held sadness. The kind that felt reminiscent of your time in the safe house while he was recovering. When he was determined to go back to Rika, to sacrifice himself. In his letters he wrote of how much he missed you, how much he wanted to come back. 

After a particularly cringy one Jihyun had pulled part of his sweater over his head in embarrassment. 

“I was not having a great time that night.” He said. “I also think I’d had a little too much to drink, I’m so sorry.” You laughed reading over the letter again. 

“I want to paint only you forever, I don’t care if I become poor and destitute, I only want to create your image.” Jihyun groaned. “I think it’s cute.” He shook his head. 

“Can we just move on?” You put it back in the box and ran a hand through his hair poking out from his sweater where his face was hidden. 

“Sure love, why don’t you read one?”

You read through more letters and notes until you got to the last one. You read the date, only one day before his return to you. A smile crossed your face while you pulled out this final note. Unfolding it you began to read aloud, one more time. 

“My dearest MC, 

I’m sitting in the airport now. My flight to you boards in just under an hour. I can’t deny how excited I am to return to you. Everytime my mind wanders it goes to you, I wonder what you’ll look like. How much you’ve changed since I saw you two years ago. 

I keep thinking of what I want to say to you, I tried to even write out a speech for you. Confessing everything I feel, everything I’ve learned since I’ve been away, but no matter what I wrote it never seemed to sound right. Maybe it would be better if I just spoke from the heart. 

This is the moment I’ve been dreaming about for the past two years. Since even before I left you. Somehow I’m still nervous though. So much can change in two years, I know I have. The one thing though, that hasn’t changed is my feelings for you. 

Even if I couldn’t admit it then. I love you. More than I’ve ever loved anyone in my life. 

I imagine this will likely be my last letter to you. Since I’ll be seeing you in only a few hours, but I love you. I love you so much. 

With love, Jihyun Kim.” 

Tears filled your eyes, Jihyun’s hand moved up to wipe the ones that escaped away from your cheeks. You sniffled and put it back in its envelope. Putting it back so carefully. 

“I love you too Jihyun, My feelings never changed either, just got stronger.” You leaned in and kissed him. The words of the latter written 366 days ago still in your head, then pulling away you glanced to the last letter you wrote to him. Dated for the same day. “Go ahead.” 

He opened the final one, taking in a deep breath. You curled around him, arms circling his waist and your head on his shoulder. This is one you remembered well. 

“My love, V. 

I just picked up my dry cleaning. Tomorrow is the RFA party. The first one since the cancelled one two years ago. I’ve been planning it for months now, this party is going to be huge. We have celebrities of all kinds coming, and so many different unique guests. I can’t help but be thrilled. 

I’m scared too. Jumin has assured me that everything will go well, but I hope I did okay. I think most of all, I just hope that you’d be proud of this party, and think I did a good job. 

The fact it’s been two years since I last saw you doesn’t feel real. It feels like just yesterday I said goodbye, and also? It feels like it has been a million years. 

I hope wherever you are you’re warm and comfortable. I hope you’ve found the courage to paint again, I hope your heart has healed since I last saw you. As much as I want you to come home to me I also hope you’re at peace. Because you deserve to be happy, and you deserve to feel at ease. 

I’m still waiting, and I’ll keep waiting. Even if it takes two more years, or five, or ten, even if you don’t return until we’re old and wrinkled I’ll still wait. My heart is yours, and it will always be. 

Tomorrow and forever, everything I do will be dedicated to you. I love you Jihyun Kim, and I’ll keep waiting for you. Forever. 

Sincerely, with all my heart, 

MC.”


End file.
